We had just finished an epic day at Future Music Festival, and my body was about to go into shock. I was going through a mini-hangover from the drinking earlier in the day. I was starving, I was thirsty, I was tired from the walking and dancing. My body was royally screwed over and crying for some rest. But you know.. it was only midnight and the night was still young… Haymarket Hotel was nearby so I scoffed down some nutrients from a Korean restaurant and then I went down for a little visit.. here we go!

The Market @ Haymarket Hotel

Assessment Time:  ~12:30 – 2am
Opening Hours: 9pm – 2am
Website: http://www.themarketvip.com
Address: 661-663 George St, Chinatown, Sydney

Dress Code / Door Policy: As stated on the door “STRICT DRESS CODE APPLIES.. Guys collared shirts or jackets are essential – no sportswear, shorts or runners”. I was still wearing my American Indian outfit from Future Music Festival a few hours earlier. It was just brown pants with the indian top on, non-collared. I walked up to the scary looking security woman. She looks at me and my outfit and lets me in – telling the girls at the counter “Don’t worry let him in – He’s alright!!!”. Hell yeah – Chief Breaking wind is awesome! (Edit 24/03/10 – Truth be told, the promoters knew about Future Music Festival and apparently have ‘relaxed’ the dress code for tonight for any FMF party goers)
Entry Fee / Cover Charge: $20
Guestlist: Discount if on list. email themarketvip@gmail.com – free entry before 10:30 . Before I got in, some people spoke with me and said I could pretend to be on “David’s guestlist”. However when I got to the counter, guestlists were finished at 12am, so it was no longer relevant. I know the promoter, but only if he were here tonight I could’ve scored free entry.
Inside: Promotional material claims 3 levels. Well its 3, but more 2 and a half. Bottom level is the Mi Cocktail lounge, and is very loungey, and dark. It has a bar and the lounge area is cut into 3 smaller areas, and for the promoters point of view it is presumed these can be used for birthday events. Ground level is where the main bar is and main dancefloor is. The actual dancefloor itself is very small. As small as the one they have at Bar 333. (Yes, they do have a dancefloor, its that small) – about 4 x 5 metres square. Even the bar here is bigger than the floor. Stools are everywhere around. Top level upstairs hangs over the bar and lounge area, to overlook the ground floor. I didnt go upstairs because I was told a group of gangsters were chilling out over there. (All the gansters have matching leather jackets with their gang sign emblazoned on the back) This is where also the DJ is spinning his tracks.
Cloak Room: None
Bar: I didn’t drink tonight
DJs: Kai, Willtown, Biggie, Beef, Nam (obtained for the 20th March event, but these are usually the same DJs for the weeks prior).
Music: RnB, HipHop, House Mashups. I can’t believe they have one DJ to service all 3 levels here. Could it be a money saving exercise? Who knows, it’s a different approach though.
Crowd: Asian, and mostly older. There is a 30th birthday party here, and I see some other asians I recognise around the 25 year old age mark.
Entertainment: No extra dancers or MC that I could recall, but there probably was an MC
Atmosphere: It was busy, but it was not at capacity as it was a few weeks ago when I tried to get in. Interesting. Half the asians being at Future Music Festival and going home afterwards may have been a factor.
360 view video from the ground floor dancefloor
YouTube Preview Image

Keep reading more on the timeline ..


My energy comes back!
Well I was really tired.. so I walk upon the small dancefloor and I spot Derelick and andy upstairs. They see me and laugh about how silly I look. I start to dance slow, and by miracle, the music has given me energy and soon enough I am dancing with my feet while people who stand by and watch in awe as the American Indian does his dance. Quite fun.

Downstairs we go, and I come up to the bar. The bar tender girl can’t stop smiling at me, but she dare not say a word about it. We both know what is going on, and I refuse to explain myself. Hmph!

Harassed by that sound
I don’t know how the sound goes, but it sort of sounds like ‘oololoolooo loo loo loo !’, while you shape your mouth in an ‘O’ shape and rapidly tap your mouth with the palm of your hand. You know, that American Indian noise that we make before attacking some Conferedate bastards.

So everywhere I go, I hear girls go ‘OOllaooloooloo loo loo !!’ as I walk by. They think its the funniest thing they have ever done. Well, frankly, its racist. I don’t do that. As a member of the Apache tribe I am offended by such ignorant behaviour by pretty girls! 🙂 Oh its all fun and games isn’t it?

It was only a quick 90 minute trip here, as the place closes at 2am. We were promptly kicked out.

A normal clubbing night. There was a fight upstairs though.. which was not surprising in the Chinatown side of things. Though i did come late, so I don’t know how good it was earlier.

The Market @ Haymarket Hotel – 5.5/10

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2 Responses to The Market @ Haymarket Hotel Sydney: Saturday 6th March 2010

  1. I see u pundit says:

    Pretty low score! How bout a reassessment if you go earlier? I hear the bar chicks are h0000t

    • James says:

      I may consider a reassessment but not anytime soon. It was a low score, but the score is an overall thing to cater for anyone reading the review. If you like loungey places and somewhere chatty, you would like this place, but if you were here for a dancing clubbing experience, this is not your cup of tea.

      I would say most bar chicks at any bar are hot, but yes, they are easy on the eyes 🙂

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