We wanted to visit another club tonight but from the outside it looked really, really, shit, so we didn’t take any chances, and went down to the Martin Place precinct to visit one of the clubs there..  here we go!

Front w/ DJ

Front w/ DJ

Luxe (Formerly Vanity) @ Martin Place Bar
Assessment Time: 12:25AM – 3:00AM
Opening Hours: Around 10PM – 4:00AM ??
Lockout: Unknown, but they were still accepting entry fees for people after 3AM for entry.
Address: 51 Martin Place (Elizabeth St corner), opposite hotel chambers.
Venue Website: http://www.martinplacebar.com.au
Event Website: http://www.facebook.com/LuxeSaturdays
Promoters: Urban Agent, VIPList, ESO
Occurrence: Started 3rd March. Previously it was called Vanity, held next door at Verandah Bar, and it has recently moved here to Martin Place Bar.
Outside Line: The line looked long. 30-50 people lining up. It took about 15 minutes to get in. It is frustrating to see other people being able to cut the line and get in beforehand by knowing the promoters et al. , it always is.
Dress Code / Door Policy: Quite a few people are here from Future Music Festival, so the dress code is very relaxed tonight – people in their singlets and outfits mixed up with people who came here dressed up for clubbing.
Entry Fee / Cover Charge: $25 Full entry.
Guestlist:Contact your preferred promoter or use any of the following: Info@eso.net.au luxe@viplist.net.au luxe@urbanagent.com.au

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We had just left a dress up party, and simply put this was the closest place nearby for a dance… a guestlist was sent a day earlier – here we go!

1AM - Taken from the DJ Podium

1AM - Taken from the DJ Podium

WOW @ Martin Place Bar , Sydney
Assessment Time: 12:10AM – 4:00AM
Opening Hours: Unknown (Probably 10:00PM) –
Lockout: Unknown
Address: 51 Martin Place
Venue Website: http://www.martinplacebar.com.au
Promoter Website: http://www.urbanagent.com.au http://www.facebook.com/WOWSaturdays http://www.ohsnap.com.au
Occurrence: Every Saturday since Winter 2011. This replaced the previous “Bamboo” event running for the 6 years prior. It’s run under the same promoters though. At time of writing it appears the “Bamboo” event will make a return under a new venue.
Outside Line: It was quite the long line our late arrival after midnight. We ended up waiting about 25 minutes before we got inside the club. This is typical for a busy event. I would try to get here before 10:30 if you want to have shorter lines – but in return you’re going to get a dead club upon entry.
Dress Code / Door Policy: “Strict” no hat policy was advertised, but it was weakly enforced. I had my hectic punk hair on. Someone else was dressed as a Chef, complete with a Chef’s hat. Most guys and girls were dressed at minimum smart casual and dressy/chic/sexy.
Entry Fee / Cover Charge: $25 full entry was paid. Discounted entry before 12:30AM if you sent in a guestlist prior.
Guestlist: wow@ohsnap.com.au I sent a guestlist the day before but there was no confirmation – however it did turn up on the list while people before me entered. Sadly enough when I got to the cashier it was too late. 

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1:30AM Inside crowd shot of about half the floor

1:30AM Inside crowd shot of about half the floor

Out tonight to celebrate Special K’s birthday tonight – I’m a bit late but I’m here now – wooo! Here we go!

Bamboo @ Martin Place Bar
Assessment Time: 01:30AM – 03:30AM
Opening Hours: 10:30PM (or earlier) – 03:30AM
Lockout: Unknown, probably 03:00AM
Address: Corner Elizabeth St and Martin Place.
Venue Website: http://www.martinplacebar.com.au
Promoter Website: http://www.urbanagent.com.au
Occurrence: Every Saturday night for the past few years. Recently celebrated their 5th anniversary.
Outside Line: There wasn’t much of a line – probably 2 people in front when I arrived for late entry.
Dress Code / Door Policy: Most people are smart casual, but casual is okay here. I was feeling daggy tonight – I’m wearing an out of fashion jacket with loose t-shirt and a pair of old jeans with matching runners. I looked really shithouse tonight.
Entry Fee / Cover Charge: Full price $25. $20 on guestlist before midnight. Free entry for ladies before 11PM with appropriate voucher, and free entry promotion for first year university/tafe students.
Guestlist: Submit via the promoter website above.
Inside: Nothing has changed since last time, except that the dancing pole has been removed, probably for safety reasons, as I have seen dancing poles fall down before. Anyways, to recap, walk into a long narrow room which is half occupied by the bar. The dancefloor fits about 5-8 people wide while it stretches along the length of the bar 30-40 people deep. There is a small VIP area at the back with a secondary bar about 8 people wide. Further out from the main bar and dancefloor is a corresponding outdoor/smoking area.
Cloak Room: I didn’t utilize cloak room services tonight, but it is found at the far back corner near the gambling area.
Bar Prices / Line: $9 for a vodka lemonade from memory. The line was 2-3 people deep, but birthday girl somehow managed to squeeze her way (ie push in) through these people within 2-3 minutes. I learned some dirty tactics that girls use, and realise that lining up at the bar is pretty much a battle zone in the eyes of a girl. I do advocate lining up rightly so, but some people I guess want their drink much more than others.
Music Style: Mostly contemporary american RnB, with the occasional house song thrown in to mash things up.
Crowd & Ratio: Almost everyone here is Asian. I did come very late into the night so there were noticeably more guys, but that’s typical of a normal club at this time. The girls here, may not be many but they were pretty decent looking.
Entertainment: They did have podium dancers (woo!) and Jason the Korean bum dancer was here as well. If you haven’t seen him in action, you just have to be there on most Saturdays here. Highly recommended. Hmm… It’s also only hit me just now after all these years that he loves polo shirts…
Atmosphere: Pretty busy and hard extremely to find your own personal space for a dance spot inside.. until around 2:15ish AM when some people left the club. In the meantime, dancing outside, at the very back or front near the DJ, or on the podiums would have to suffice for people just reentering the dancefloor area.

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Bamboo was having a white party! Oh god I hate this place but it was a white party – I had to go.. and to make sure I wouldn’t change my mind, they threw in free entry all night and a free drink for anyone dressed in all white!! With the sad news that Sensation White was cancelled and no longer returning to Australia (the promotional ad had ironically told people “why wait for Sensation this year?”), this was a rare chance to whip out the good old Gandalf the white outfit, so I rounded up some friends and got this thing started – here we go!

Jesus with worshippers at Bamboo

Jesus with worshippers at Bamboo

Bamboo @ Martin Place Bar – 17th July 2010
Assessment Time: 11:00PM – 04:00AM
Opening Hours: 10:30 PM- 04:00AM
Lockout: None
Website: http://www.urbanagent.com.au , http://www.martinplacebar.com.au
Address: 51 Martin Place, Corner of Elizabeth Street Sydney
Dress Code / Door Policy: Casual allowed. Half the dudes are smart casual, and the other half are just.. casual. Girls are all in dresses and wearing their faces. Lots of pretty girls. and they’ve relaxed policy somewhat – they have allowed hats to be worn inside!
Entry Fee / Cover Charge: Free entry all night if you wore white. Otherwise standard cover charges apply. $20 on guestlist before midnight. Free on guesetlist if you get to the counter before 10:30 (small chance), and $25 after midnight.
Guestlist: eric@urbanagent.com.au
Occurence: Every Saturday only.
Inside: Walk into a small bar to hold about 150 or so people – DJ at the front corner. Bar on the right hand side of the venue,taking up half of the floor space. 4 podiums are dotted along the length of the dancefloor, including one with a dancing pole. Small private area at back but was really open to anyone who walked in. Outdoor smoking and BBQ area on the left of the venue.
Cloak Room: $5 for all items.
Bar: I can’t remember. 3 ABC shots for $36 ?
Music: Primarily Hip Hop / RnB tonight. Top 40 and Commerical House mashup as well. DJ’s are mixing it well, keeping the crowd always active and dancing.
Crowd: Dominantly Asian. I spotted 2 white girls, 3 black guys as the minorities here tonight. There were probably a few more handful of the minorities. Age wise it varied, but most people I met were in their early 20’s. It seems as all the teens have gone to Funky. Bad news in a few years time for Bamboo as they would soon have no base.
Entertainment:Theme tonight was White. White balloons all over the place. MC to keep things going. Podium dancers, but only one or two. BBQ outside to feed your tummy. Similar to Shanghai Nights (well, it is the same promoter)
Atmosphere: At its peak, the place is extremely packed, and you would be hard pressed to find some floor space to dance – you would really need to hop up on the podiums to have your own dance action. Outside of peak periods it was still pretty busy. Most of the crowd are singing along to the songs, so pretty vibrant.
Video: 360 of Bamboo @ Martin Place Bar (at the back)
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Tonight is boxing day. I am at World Square Pub, while my dance buddy M visits his new found glory hole Bamboo @ Martin Place Bar and bumps into my friend Special K. I was meant to turn up but I happily dogged them for the once off Funky Buddha event tonight – anyway M has been kind enough to write a review for the website for tonight!!! (As of April 2010) Both M and Special K have made an established name for themselves at the venue, amongst patrons and staff, thanks to their ‘incredible’ dancing. So read on below my dear reader, and delve into the thoughts of one half of the new dance couple of Bamboo!

BAMBOO @ Martin Place Bar: 26th December 2009 [Boxing Day]

( Review submitted  by M )

Assessment Time: 10.20 PM – 3 AM
Address: 51 martin place corner of Elizabeth Street, Sydney
Dress Code: Casual tonight. Although security stated a “No hat” policy, I was not harrassed to take my hat off at all inside at any time. The Asian girls here dress to impress in tight fitting cocktail dresses.
Entry fee/Cover Charge: A scandalous $25 general entry, $20 Guestlist.
Inside: DJ stand at the front towards the entrance, opposite the admissions booth. One room, a bar turned dance club so the whole floor serves as a dancefloor; moderately spacious for about 50 – 70 people, but usually packed like sardines since the crowds always exceed that amount by at least triple and a half. Two bars, main bar along the left side wall, smaller bar in a VIP section at the back. More lounges for general use towards the far back right and a cloakroom there as well. Two square platforms along the right side for the brave and the wild [One usually occupied by JASON the notorious Bamboo Bum dancer] and a podium with a Pole on it for pole dancing!

VIP section has three lounges enough to fit about 12 people comfortably, with standing space and a table in the centre of it for mingling.

Large outdoor smoking area, not very sheltered so some of the drizzle was getting on the floor and people were getting a little damp but no one seemed to mind.
Cloakroom: Yes

Music: Predominantly RnB/Hip Hop, some House. DJ was decent with his mix.
Entertainment: Live MC keeping things fresh, and professional dancers on the platform for some decent intervals throughout the night, scantily clad and quite decent looking! There were even some majorly buff male strippers in bowties at the start of the night dispensing some sort of promotional freebies for the ladies.
Crowd/Atmosphere: Crowd is almost saturated with asians. I might have seen about 4 people that were caucasion the whole night. There was a decent turn out for Boxing Day, floor got reasonably packed towards midnight, but not as terrible as what I’m used to other times I’ve done Bamboo, and a lot better than some other clubs such as Chinese Laundry where ventilation is shocking.

Very laid back atmosphere due to the RnB, but still totally pumping. It was Boxing Day and everyone was in a great mood. There was only one scuffle with some Koreans getting a little hot under the collar, but no one was thrown out since it dissolved in a hurry and no punches were thrown. Security was quite relaxed tonight a good many of the people I was hanging out with that night were pretty much falling off the platforms blind drunk with 8 standard drinks in them but yet no one was removed due to intoxication.

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We spent a good 2 hours at Pavillion dancing then it reached around 12:30, where everybody typically leaves. It was time to find another club, but we just ended up walking around half of the Sydney CBD area checking out the typical clubs…. so here we go!

11 Quick Club reviews as seen from outside the club aka Window Shopping – 19th December 2009. (Northern Sydney CBD)

Saturdays @ Star Bar on George St
– Packed. However we had overdosed lately on Star Bar and its amusing crowd of non-english speaking tourists. It was a no go tonight, no matter how tempting it was to go inside there.

PS. I no longer write reviews when I visit star bar, as I visit this place too much.

Saturdays @ Arthouse on Pitt St (1am)
– Tonight was not an ‘Asian’ night (Fame), but it was a white-crowd event. House music was playing outside, and there was no line outside – it looked pretty shit inside from the outside. There was a cover charge.

Saturdays @ The Vault on Pitt St
– We walked by this bar and heard RNB music playing! Whoa, we have to try it out. We walk up to the entrance and there is a smallish dance floor with about 15 people dancing on it – it was almost dead, but better than Pavillion. However the bouncer refused us entry on the excuse of ‘a private function’. We were 4 guys so it was understandable, but the private function excuse didn’t seem congruent, as there was no second person to confirm a guestlist. Whatever, it was dead.

Saturdays @ Coolabar
– Music is pumping out, tape and escalators are in operation to the bar upstairs. There are two people outside. It was on! We know Coolabar is a shithole, but we want to wow the crowd inside, if there was one.

We run up but the two people inside tell us we can’t go inside, as the place is closed. What!?! You wonder why some places are even open at all if they are closing at 1.30am on a Saturday night.

Bamboo @ Martin Place Bar
– The line is shorter than usual, but there *is* a line, which is better than the other places so far. Entirely asian, and RNB playing outside, it is tempting to go inside, but all four of us were not big fans of paying $25 to go inside. People inside had santa hats on. We could see Jason the resident Korean bum dancer hogging the podium from the outside.

Security came up and spoke with us. We had a short fun chat and perved on some girls walking by, you know, typical man stuff. Security was called to kick out a drunk person. Moments later he is walking out with a drunk girl and 3 of her girlfriends supporting her. haha, it is not classy at all to see a drunk girl, let me tell you that. Security tells the girls it is all ok, and wraps his arms around the two girls beside him. LOL omg he is hitting on drunk girls outside of thd club – I want to be a bouncer now!!! haha, what a sneaky sleaze.

Funky Buddha @ Verandah Bar on Castlereagh St (Martin Place)
Here they recently opened the trance room again (after a 3 or 4 year absence). Cover is $20, crowd is asian, music is RNB and trance.

We ask some girls who left Funky Buddah if it was any good.
“Average” was the reply. It was in other words, shit. There was, though, a line outside, so it must be somewhat ok.

I do want to check it out as it’s been a while, and I have to see how the Trance room looks now.

Saturdays @ Red Room Hotel Chambers on Castlereagh St (Martin Place)

We were able to peek inside from the entrance – and even though it looked crowded, it didn’t seem like a fun atmosphere. Music was old school RNB, with a cover charge of $20 and an asian crowd.

Tank Nightclub (Bridge lane)
OneLove moved to the Bourbon about a month ago, and we did not know if there was any event, so we took a punt and walked here. It was, unfortunately, closed. (At the time writing, Onelove @ the Bourbon has also shut its doors)… I think I might start a new event here! ha.

20/20 @ Brooklyn Hotel (George St Circular Quay)
Ever since Privilege closed for renovations a few weeks ago, promoters Hypnotize moved their Saturday event to Brooklyn and joined with Urban Agent to help out. The result is that my favourite place to go for free drunk girls and $17 Vodka Red Bulls has turned into a cover charged event full of not so drunk people. I yearn for the former glory days of seediness.

I peek inside the main rnb room and it is pretty packed. I go around the back and look down in the outdoor courtyard area where they are playing house/trance. Back in the no-cover charge days, the place usually had 5-10 people dancing max, while the others sit and watch. Now with the help of the promoters, the entire back area as PACKED. Jesus fucking christ I could not believe what I was seeing – Brooklyn Hotel actually packed out! I could not see any concrete, it was just a sea of people standing up, dancing and cheering. It looked pretty awesome. The bartenders must be having a hard time adjusting to actually having to work non-stop.

However my friends, still don’t want to go inside. They are pretty adamant about not going inside here, considering the crappy times they had the last few times. haha.

Also, regular patrons here (i.e. the islanders) were lining up to get in, not knowing that they need to pay entry. There were some outside, thinking of other places to go. So the crowd inside was a mix of islanders, asians and aussies. Cover charge I am guessing is $20. Based on what I saw, it looks good.

Sienna @ Establishment on George St
We are just walking by. They’re playing house music, though I had thought Sienna was an RNB event. The crowd is dominantly Euro, and cover charge is $20. I do need to check this place out too. It looked pretty busy from what we could see

Saturdays @ Ivy on George St
Loud, and looking quite busy. We can’t see inside from the street but we can hear people cheering from the inside. Sounds like fun. Am definitely going to spend a night here one day next year.

Saturdays @ Bar 333 on George St (2am)
Bottom level was closed and upstairs looked pretty dead.

By this time we have given up, and we have managed to end up back where we started – standing outside Star Bar. I was dying to do any form of dance, but friends were puffed out from walking up and down the CBD for 2 hours. Fair enough, but I wish they were keen for a dance!! So we called it a night.

If I had to pick a club tonight, it would be 20/20 @ Brooklyn Hotel.

A friend’s birthday. She’s chosen Bamboo as the place to be.
Bamboo @ Martin Place Bar
(Assessment time: 1:30am-4:00am)
Website: http://www.urbanagent.com.au
Cover Charge/Entry Fee: $25 After midnight.
Music: RNB. Pretty good. Typical RNB you would hear at any good RNB club
Crowd: Asian
Atmosphere: Crowded. People dancing, just enough to reach close to capacity.
No line:
It was 1:30 as we arrived and there was no line. I was expecting a line, but it wasn’t at full capacity. As we entered, it was probably at around 80-90% capacity. Still pretty busy. Jason the Korean bum dancer was pretty much on one of the podiums already doing his thing.

Birthday girl is already spewing her guts out
I took a photo with the birthday girl sitting down. After the photo, she sits up and empties out the contents of her stomach onto the floor. Absolutely disgustingly hilarious stuff. Apparently her 4th chunder that night.

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